Dream you’re mine

The journey from miscarriage to whatever comes next

Femara and mid-cycle spotting? November 16, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — agplatters @ 10:07 pm
Tags: , , ,

So yesterday there were the three follicles, with the largest at 15.5mm.  Today I’m supposed to start using ovulation prediction kits.  It is negative, which I expected, but a second line is starting to show around 20% of the darkness of the control line.  But I’ve really been thrown for a loop.  I’m spotting.  Start of period-like spotting.  Why???

I’m not really finding any answers online.  There is mention of mid-cycle spotting to confirm ovulation, but my eggs wouldn’t be big enough yet, cervix is kinda low, I’m on cd11 (normally ovulate on cd18) and the opk is negative.  There is no reason to think I’m ovulating.  So my irrational, multiple miscarriage survivor side is taking over.  When I see blood, it means loss.  So I’m freaking out thinking I just lost one of my eggs, one of my chances at a baby that will stick.  That doesn’t make any sense!  But I’m not thinking right now.  I’m feeling.   

I think I’m going to spend the rest of the day knitting and just chilling out.  And maybe eat a big bowl of ice cream.


CD10 ultrasound November 15, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — agplatters @ 7:42 pm
Tags: , , , ,

Today was the first ultrasound following the femara from cd3-7.  The nurse saw a 15.5 mm follicle on the right and a 15mm and 12.5mm follicles on the left.  I specifically asked if it was likely I would ovulate both of the 15s and she said it was very likely, but she didn’t feel the 12.5 would catch up.  She also said my lining was thickening–I didn’t ask any details since lining has never been an issue for me.

So I start using ovulation prediction kits tomorrow afternoon.  I go for a follow up ultrasound on Tuesday (cd13) if I haven’t ovulated already.  At that point they will check the size and most likely give me the hcg shot to trigger ovulation.  If I ovulate before then, we know what to do!  But they still want to give me the hcg.

I think this is good news all around, but really don’t know any better since I haven’t gone through a monitored cycle before.  I just watched my temps and cm to figure out when I was ovulating.  I’d be thrilled if I became pregnant with both.  The nurses reaction was “you all really like the idea of twins, but we’d actually prefer singletons.”  I told her I’ve been pregnant four times and lost all of them, so it feels like I’d have better chances with two in there.  

So if I do ovulate on or around Tuesday, this will be pretty early for me.  I typically ovulate on cd17-18.  So apparently the femara not only causes the potential for more follicles, it also can speed up the growth of the follicles to maturity.  She confirmed that can happen.


Maybe babies? November 8, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — agplatters @ 1:04 pm
Tags: , , ,

Yesterday was a baseline ultrasound on cd 2.  The nurse said there were “a few” follicles on my left and then just pointed out my right ovary.  That might have been my first glimpse at our baby.  On the one hand, there is this nagging voice inside full of doubts…wondering if I’ll only have a baby for a few months in my uterus again.  On the other, hearing those words made it seem so much more real.  Within a month, I could be finding out one of those follicles is growing into a baby.  Our bodies really are fascinating.

So today is the start of the medicated part of the cycle.  We are doing a medicated cycle with timed intercourse.  It is completely bizarre to be on fertility meds when I’ve been pregnant four times and I’m not convinced that encouraging my ovaries is going to give us a healthy baby.  I’d probably be pretty skeptical about anything right about now.  So here is what is involved–they called it a step up protocol with femara:

CD3-take one 2.5 mg pill of femara (letrozole)

CD4–take two pills

CD5–take 3 pills

CD6–take 4 pills

I’m supposed to take them at the same time every day and then go for a follow up u/s on CD10 to see what is going on with the follicles.  There are a couple of reasons the doctor is recommending this.  My FSH is barely elevated (10.5 and they want it below 10), I’m almost 39 and my biological mom went through menopause by 40.  All signs point to my ovaries starting to shut down.  This means some months I might not ovulate, although that has not happened yet.  This will ensure that I do.  The other reason is they are hoping a couple of the follicles will develop.  I didn’t want to delve into that too much.  Maybe it was to increase the chances that one will be fertilized, but I can’t help thinking it is in case I miscarry again I might still have one left.  

What is femara?  It is actually a drug for breast cancer that impacts estrogen levels.  They found that a side effect had to do with stimulating ovulation.  So this is an off-label use.  It is supposed to be a little easier to tolerate than clomid and not cause as many eggs to be produced.  

As far as the rest of my tests and progress, my TSH level has leveled out.  It started at 5.2 and dropped to 3.4 after taking 50 mcg of levothyroxine.  During the last few weeks, I upped it to 75 and I am still at 3.4.  So today I upped it again to 100.  Normal ranges were considered to be up to 5, but this was recently revised to be 3.  I’m close to normal and am feeling a little more energetic.  I’m definitely starting to feel like myself again mentally.  But we’d still like to see it lower.  Part of me thinks we should wait until next month to try to get pregnant and really get this under control, but with my age and conditions that isn’t a good option either.  

Ok, it is 7:01.  Time to take the femara.