Thanks to Lisa for nominating me for the Sisterhood award. I feel so fortunate to have found women who understand–who I can cheer on whole-heartedly; share in their disappointment, hurt and frustration; feel so much support and encouragement from each of you. That is such an award in itself! So here is how this works….
First of all, I am supposed to be able to copy and paste it into my blog. But I’m a PC girl on a macbook and I just cannot figure it out! I even googled directions and it still isn’t working. Hmph. So imagine a lovely icon and view it at sticks and stims.
Put the logo on your blog or post. (Yeah, well, macs are not my thing!)
Nominate at least 10 blogs with great attitude and/or gratitude. (Some of the blogs I follow were already nominated, so I’ll have less than 10, but still pass along….)
Be sure to link to your nominees in your post.
Let your nominees know they have received the award by leaving them a comment on their blog.
Be sure to link this post to the person who nominated you for the award. (I’m not sure if I’m technologically advanced enough to do this either!)
So today I am 12 weeks, which is considered second tri in some circles! I kinda consider myself pre-second tri. Once I make it through the NT scan in 9 days, then I’ll officially consider myself second tri. I am still tired, but starting to feel a little more energetic and not as anxious (although I still hate it when people IRL ask me about the pregnancy–I’ll talk about it when I’m feeling up to it!) This has translated into going to the gym about every other day. I’ve probably gone to the gym in the last week more than I’ve gone in any single month in the last year and a half! So last night I do this weight lifting class that I used to do several times a week. I want to make sure I’m as strong as possible for this little one. I kept it easy–ranging from 8-14 lbs for each exercise. And I skipped the ab exercises. (Does anyone know if there are safe ab exercises in pre-second tri? My guts just feel wrong about doing crunches and the like. Maybe the plank is ok?) As I left, I felt so energized and happy. Even proud of myself. Then it hit me. Ever since that first loss in Oct ’07, I’ve been angry with my body for betraying me. I hated my body and just wanted to hide it. That is why I put on the 20 lbs. That is why ice cream and wine were my main coping mechanisms. That is why I couldn’t find the energy even between pregnancies to get to the gym. (I don’t want to sound like a huge gym rat, as I definitely go through phases, but I have worked at a gym, had a great BMI, completed three marathons, etc. This was a pretty significant change for me.)
And it was just this huge light bulb moment last night, as I realized I’m starting to trust my body again and wanting to take care of it. Why did it take so long to figure that out???