Dream you’re mine

The journey from miscarriage to whatever comes next

Saline sonohystogram cancelled May 30, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — agplatters @ 12:40 am
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Due to two very early losses (chemical pregnancies), the doctor had recommended a saline sonohystogram to get a more detailed look at my uterus and lining for abnormalities that may interfere with pregnancy.  Before the procedure, they did a vaginal ultrasound. Luckily the images were so clear (the doc said it was because I’m “skinny”….ha ha ha!) that the saline sonohystogram was not needed.  There is a small fibroid on the upper external part, which would not impact pregnancy.  Otherwise she said my uterus looked perfect.  

So when you look at the factors that allow pregnancy, here’s where I’m at:

1.  Eggs: my hormone levels are great so I’m producing them regularly

2.  Tubes: well, I’ve been pregnant three times in a year (pregnant for five of those months and not trying for another two) so all clear there

3.  Uterus: looks good

Girl parts are 3 for 3.  Woo hoo!  

Boy parts are a big fat zero for one.  I suggested that maybe a sperm analysis should be done–my hubby isn’t sure if he’d feel “comfortable” with that.  Huh???  My hubby needs to mull stuff over, so there is still hope that he’ll come around.  Obviously they work, but at this point we are most likely having problems with chromosomes.  I’d just like to know if the little buggers have abnormalities.  

An interesting development is that she could see on the ultrasound that I had already ovulated.  I figured this month was a wash with the sonohystogram, so didn’t temp or chart.  I typically ovulate around day 18, which was when it was scheduled.  The earliest I’ve ovulated in the last year was day 16.  Our timing might have been optimal?  We’ll see what happens.

 

Results from day 3 FSH/estradiol test May 22, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — agplatters @ 1:26 am
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After the third miscarriage, the doctor recommended the day 3 test for FSH and estradiol.  This is a blood test that is administered on the third day of your cycle.  As a woman’s eggs start to diminish and she approaches menopause, the estradiol (an estrogen) elevates as it tries to overcompensate and initiate your eggs to mature.  That is what I’ve learned through google, so there are probably more qualified sources out there for an explanation!

Anyway, my FSH level is 7.2 and estradiol is 49.  The nurse said both were good.  It sounds like there are various ways to evaluate FSH levels, but consensus seems to be that ideally it should be lower than 15.  Here are a couple of websites I found to be helpful.

http://www.earlymenopause.com/tests.htm

This site said the normal FSH level is 3-20, but that from 10-12 they are starting to fail.  That doesn’t completely make sense to me….what does 13-20 mean then?  It also said that estradiol normal levels were 25-75, but that you may have low estrogen below 50.

http://www.advancedfertility.com/day3fsh.htm

This site provides a good description of the purpose of the test, but specifically focuses on infertility treatments and what is considered viable levels.  

Part of me feels better, reassured.  My eggs may be ok from a production standpoint.  Maybe there are still issues around the quality?  But another part of me is disappointed.  I was expecting to be premenopausal.  I felt like it would put me into a category where they know how to treat it and I’d have some answers.  

I should be grateful.

 

Enough already! May 15, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — agplatters @ 11:56 pm

All I do is wait.  I’m in a permanent waiting room that looks like my life and I don’t even know what exactly I’m waiting for really.  Dan Bern has a line about waiting….”I know how I hate to wait.  Like even for a bus or something.  An important phone call.”  Well, I’m not the messiah (that is part of the next line….) but I’m with Dan on this one.

So I am STILL waiting for my darn doctor’s office to fill out the paperwork and send my lab results to the endocrinologist so they can start treating my hypothyroidism.  How does that take 13 days?!?  I’ve already asked them twice and called the endocrinologist to see if they heard anything.  They sent a second request.  But how patient am I supposed to be on this?  Not only am I tired of being tired and fat, I spend my time reading about all the dangers of pregnancy when your thyroid isn’t under control.  Permanently waiting on that one.  Ugh.

I am calling them tomorrow for an update on the FSH test and will slip in the questions around the thyroid.  I may even try to figure out a way to express my frustration without sounding like a total bitch.  

Then we put an offer in on a house last week.  The good news is that the seller’s accepted.  The waiting part is that they are working with their bank to accept the offer, since they owe quite a bit on it.  It is called a short sale and they can drag on and on.  If we haven’t heard anything by June 13, we can walk away.  So this one isn’t as dreadful as waiting for the health stuff.  Plus I can feel like I’m making progress by doing work on our house.  

If all this waiting doesn’t end soon, I’m going to end up buying a bunch of stuff for a house we don’t own and being committed after I go 100% completely unstable with the doctor’s office.  I really do like the docs there, but their inefficiency is ridiculous.  

Question:  When was the last time you received great customer service?  That question was posed at a conference I was at and I couldn’t think of a darn thing.  Sad.

 

FSH test today May 13, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — agplatters @ 11:35 am
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Today I will have the FSH blood test that evaluates FSH and esdatirol (or something like that.)  Apparently as a woman’s body starts to prepare for menopause, the esdatirol (an estrogen) declines and that causes the FSH to go into overdrive.  So it will be a glimpse into the state of my eggs.  

I have suspected for years that changes were starting.  There were slight differences.  Period wasn’t as regular.  Luteal phase is short.  Some signs are so subtle I can’t even describe them….I just know.  But when you are in your 30s and say that, doctors don’t take you seriously.  Think of all the medical dollars that have been spent on my three miscarriages.  Why does it have to take that?  Shouldn’t they test these things before if you feel there is a need?  

I hope the test results are available quickly.  I’m ready for an answer on this one.  

 

Not pregnant May 9, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — agplatters @ 11:50 am
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Not even a little.

The bright side is I can now get the day 3 hormone testing and sonohistogram.  I can also continue to work on the house (painting), because we put an offer in on a new one last night and this place needs to be market ready.

 

3, 2, 1… May 8, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — agplatters @ 12:01 pm
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Just counting down the days to test tomorrow…..for the last few days I’ve been tired (could be period), lightheaded to the point of feeling like I’d pass out (hmmm….) and waking up in the middle of the night to pee (my first sign with the other pregnancies.)  

I am trying to brace myself for the worst, which wouldn’t be a negative test, but a positive one that isn’t successful.  Yet every time I get tricked into thinking “this one will work because (insert valid reason)”.  In this case, it was conceived over the weekend that we celebrated our first anniversary.  There was so much love, I could see the butterflies and puppies and hearts bouncing off the walls!  How could that end badly?

Ok, rational side.  Talk to me.  Reasons it could end badly:

  • Still haven’t seen specialist for thyroid or started meds due to inefficiencies in the doctor’s offices
  • If there is an underlying issue with my hormones or uterus lining, those haven’t been tested and can’t be until after my period

 

 

Maybe an answer? May 2, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — agplatters @ 10:59 am
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In Feb, the doc ran a bunch of blood tests and found that my thyroid was slightly out of whack.  The follow up test showed it was fine.  Last week the doc said there is another test that can be done because some people have a thyroid that fluctates from from fine to bad.  I’m working on the details of getting in to an endocrinologist to learn more, but my doc did recommend that I start taking synthoid.  

The other tests are still to come.  It is cool and scary to have this little tidbit about why I continue to miscarry.  I hate taking medications, but do have all the symptoms around being tired, down and putting on weight (maybe it isn’t just from eating my face off?!?).  And it does regulate the hormones, so it makes sense that there is a correlation to the pregnancies.  But I suspect this is all due to menopause being around the corner.  I’m on the young end for that, but my biological mom finished it by 40.  I’m 38.  So part of me is fearful that it is all inevitable–my chances of having a natural child are dwindling quickly.

Again I’m stuck in that limbo of wanting a plan, but being afraid of what it is.  Really I want a plan and I want it to be “have sex and have a healthy baby.”  Simple.  Effective.  Feasible?